I really really wanted to send them a gift. It was probably more for me than them, but the first Christmas that my kids were abroad, I packed a big box full of gifts. I wrapped each item in cute holiday paper, included some of their very favorite American treats, and carefully pasted their confusing address–in both English and their Asian language (which I had to print from an email they sent because I had no idea how to write or type the characters)–onto a mailing label. Then I lumbered off to the post office. Once I got there I was required to fill out multiple customs forms where I had to list each item and its value in teeny tiny boxes (One feels silly writing Cheddar Blasted Goldfish Crackers onto a government form, but I did so because I was a newbie and didn’t know that amount of specificity was not required). Not only did this whole process take me the better part of an hour in a sauna-like post office, the large box weighed nearly 20 pounds and cost me more than $200 to send. I was exhausted and alarmed and vowed, even if my momma heart bid me so, I would never send another package abroad.
My Goers eventually got the package after six weeks of waiting. They received some communication that it had arrived and, after days of searching, eventually tracked it down at a convenience store across town. They enjoyed their Christmas gifts–and their Cheddar Blasted Goldfish–in the middle of January.
I don’t know if you have attempted to send your kids a package or not. Maybe they are in a country with a more efficient mail system. Maybe the packages you send don’t end up piled in a heap on the sidewalk outside the local noodle shop. Maybe it takes less than two months for them to receive mail from home. Regardless, here is what I have learned. America has a great system for mail and delivery and I am very thankful for it. Don’t assume that the same system exists in countries abroad. Keep your head and heart happy by finding a non-postal way. Check out my ideas for non-physical Goer gifts that you can send your kids this Christmas:
SUBSCRIPTIONS
Subscriptions are a great gift that lasts all year. You may be thinking “magazine subscription,” and you could do this non-physically with ZINIO, but subscriptions to streaming services like Netflix or Audible (audiobooks), gift cards for Kindle books, iTunes, or online courses or classes might be more eagerly received. Ask your kids about any Amazon-like services in their country; maybe you could send an actual physical gift!
ANNUAL PASSES
Do your kids live in a large city with a zoo or an aquarium? How about a museum? Maybe a popular tourist attraction? Maybe a local pool? Or a rock climbing gym? Research interesting venues that are close to your Goers then email them an online pass or gift card. If none of these possibilities exist, Venmo them and have them buy these gifts with the allocated funds.
EXPERIENCES
Speaking of Venmo, it might be fun to send money specifically designated for a meal at a fancy restaurant, a manicure at a nearby spa, or even for a monthly purchase at the local flower shop. If you want to gift a married couple, experiences like attending a professional sporting event or concert can be fun (Sometimes unfamiliarity with your Goer’s culture makes this more difficult. A little online sleuthing or covert conversations with them could offer clues). If you want to go really big, you could check the website Tinggly and let your Goer choose their own experience!
DONATIONS
Are your kids passionate about a cause or situation? Send money to that organization in their names. In the past, I have donated to a variety of places; Samaritan’s Purse, Heifer International, Mercy Ships, and Compassion International. Type your child’s interest followed by “charity” into your preferred search engine to find more opportunities for giving. Your Goer may also appreciate a one-time support gift from you or a donation to their sending church.
PRESENCE
If funds are a little tight this year, you can still give PRESENCE, not presents. Presence for your overseas kids might look like:
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Starting a book club via Zoom (with a free account, you can get 40 minutes of talk time each session). Send them a Kindle book and get the same book for yourself and spend time discussing it each week.
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Beginning a cooking class with them. Prepare all necessary ingredients beforehand, then Zoom or Marco Polo and teach them to make a favorite recipe while they watch (and maybe make it at the same time!)
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Reading to them. If you have grandchildren, check out some Christmas books from the Library and videotape yourself reading them. Send this file via email or Google Drive to your kids. Have your grandchild read you a book (if they are old enough) and send it back to you.
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Creating a slideshow (with added music if you are techy) of fun moments from family events during the past year. Send it to them with a message telling them they are missed.
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Sending them a funny e-card to tell them you are thinking of them.
I realize non-physical gifts might not be as satisfying as watching your kids open actual gifts in your presence, but with a little creativity and some lowered expectations, Christmas can be rewarding for both you and your Goers.
After all, it’s not about what we give, it’s about what God gave us at Christmas: Jesus! Let’s celebrate this very best gift together with our far away kids this year! No postage required!
Parents of Goers 